Friday, October 14, 2011

Who buys this stuff?

There are so many products out there these days that are supposed to make our lives more convenient or healthy, but sometimes I can't help but be confused or entertained by them. And the commercials are hilarious! So dramatic. Sometimes they just make me say, "Why in the world would someone ever buy that thing?" So, here's a list of some products that make me go hmmm.

1. Those designer diapers that have cool prints on them. My kid is going to poop in this thing and then I'm going to So, yeah, I would love to pay an extra $10 for them because they look like blue jeans. If I wanted my kid to look like he was wearing blue jeans, I would dress him jeans! Duh.

2. Disposable paper towels in my bathroom. I love how in the commercials they make that family use the same white towel for 5 months and use it for everything from changing the oil in the car to picking their noses and then hang it back up on the rack. First of all, my kids use the kitchen towels to wash the dog and secondly, they never in the history of ever, hang the towel back up in the bathroom. I walk in, find the towel on the floor or in the sink smeared with God only knows what and I put a new towel up. The end.

3. This one is even more stupider than the last one. Yes, I said more stupider. The automatic soap dispenser. Why the heck do I need a touchless soap dispenser? So I am forced to buy only your brand of soap that comes in the special bottle that fits inside the dispenser? Probably. If my filthy, dirty soap pump has some germs on it- so what? Am I not getting ready to wash my hands? Are soap bottle germs immune to washing? Questions to ponder, people.

4. Vegetable slicer-thingies. I have a mandoline. Thought it would be great! They make them look so easy and handy on TV. The reality is that in the amount of time it takes me to locate all the pieces, put the darn thing together and actually use it, I could have sliced enough potatoes by hand to feed the US Marine Corps. And the silly thing is way harder to use in real life than on TV. I can't even tell you the number of times I have cut myself using it. Well, actually I can because I've used it twice and cut myself both times. So there. A regular ol' knife is less painful. Emotionally and physically.

5. Any product whose target audience is my very impressionable and mighty persuasive children. Have you seen my kid's rooms?

6. The omelette pan or whatever they call it. Does it taste different if my goodies are tucked inside the egg rather than scrambled in? I think not.

There are so many more of these that I'm sure I'll think of more as I lay in bed tonight. Most of the time I watch my shows on the DVR so I fast forward through all the blaring insanity that is the commercial. The DVR-now there's a product I can stand behind! Because watching normal TV is sooo hard.